Saturday, November 8, 2008

Four Days

Four days.

That's how long it took my body to revert back to a delayed sleep phase after forcing it into a crack-of-dawn schedule for exactly 30 days. It's also how long it took for me to feel halfway human again, rather than like a truck ran me over, backed up over my unconscious body, then ran me over again. It's been a rough month.

It's clear now that it's impossible to write about what it's like to live on a lark schedule while I'm actually on it, because I'm simply too exhausted to write. I honestly thought I was joking when I said that maybe I'd sleep again mid-November - but I was pretty close.

I actually was able to start sleeping on my own schedule again the night of Sunday, November 2. Here's how the previous 30 days went:

3 days of getting up early to meet an insane work deadline
3 days of getting up early for flights and work meetings
1 day of getting up early to get the bazillion things done that I had to do (both work and personal) in the 24 hours I had at home before catching a flight to Lima
16 days of getting up early (or not sleeping at all - more on that later) in Peru
3 days of getting up early for marathon fieldwork, trying to squeeze a week's worth of it into the three and a half days they actually gave me to do it
4 days of getting up early for filmmaking bootcamp in Santa Barbara

Then FINALLY - a day when I didn't have any early-morning obligations!!! Bliss!!!! But it took a while for my body to catch up.

The first night, I fell asleep at 8:30pm. I just couldn't keep my eyes open. I woke up at 7:45am, but I was still really, really tired.

The second night, I fell asleep around 9:30pm and slept until about 8:30am. Still exhausted. Despite the long hours I'd been sleeping, it was clear that I still hadn't made a dent in the sleep deficit I'd built up over the last 30 days.

The third night, I fell asleep around 9:30 again, and slept until 9:15am. Dragged myself through the day.

The fourth night, things were starting to shift a little. Still, at 10:30pm I crashed hard until I woke up at 9:30am.

But the fifth night? I felt great! I have a lot of work to catch up on from being gone, and I was cranking it out until 11:30pm before I even looked at the clock. I didn't fall asleep until 1:00am, and for the first time in a month, I actually had tons of energy. I woke up at 9:20 this morning, ready to go.

The strange thing is that during that 30 days, there were plenty of nights that I got more than 8 hours of sleep (although there were a few nights with little to no sleep as well). Still, it didn't seem to matter how many hours I slept - if it wasn't at the "right" time for my body, I felt like I hadn't slept at all. And no matter what, I was never, ever, not even once, able to wake up at the designated daybreak hour without an alarm clock or wake-up call. Well, wake-up call may not be exactly the right word. "Wake-up yell at my tent door" or "wake-up pounding on the hostel wall" is more like it. You get the idea.

The thing is, my body just does not adjust. It's not a matter of getting used to going to bed early and waking up early, because rather than getting easier to do, it got harder as time went on.

Right now, I'm rejoicing in my return to "normality," as abnormal as it may be to other people. But it won't last long...I have 11 days of early morning fieldwork, travel, and meetings coming up starting Nov 16. So I'm going to enjoy my 8 days working from home on my own schedule, and try to forget that soon I won't be able to sleep again until Thanksgiving. It never ends. I'll always be out-of-sync.

Over the next few weeks, I'll be writing more about my sleepwalking...uh, I mean travels in Peru and posting some photos and maybe some video. Some entries will be more sleep-related than others, but it's all cool stuff!

Here's a hint of things to come - me, two days walk from the nearest village. Yes, I think I am insane. But was it worth the sleep deprivation?? You betcha! Every bit of it. :-)